My Life and Hard Times

To whomsoever it may or may not concern

Ho hum....life has been more or less hectic. A ton of tests and a good friend's leaving for Vizag....it feels like I've weathered a storm. And after the storm came the fall. A rather rough one on Colaba Causeway which has resulted in three painkillers a day besides a torn chudidar. One moment I was perfectly alright, and the next I was kneeling as if in prayer, and my left knee took all the brunt. Sir (Capt. S. Raj...I call him Sir) and Caro literally picked me off the pavement and bundled me into a cab after I had rested some on a stool provided by the kindly neighbourhood paan wala.(Pssst....Sir seems to be acquainted with some rather weird people, useful though they may be). All protests of "I am alright, and the torn part is not visible, and we can make it to Churchgate" were shot down with alacrity. Sir saw me to my door lest I manage to damage myself further. A good thing too considering that the swelling and pain are yet to abate.

Ever since I have been suggesting potential PhD topics for psychology enthusiasts. What do you say to a study of the correlation between the way you tumble and the level of embarrassment? You could create your own made to order tumbles with orange/banana/apple peels/other things more or less rotten + your choice of public/private places + incredibly embarrassing post trauma questionnaires. e.g. "How do you feel about the fact that your b** was sticking out when you fell?" Generally horrified when I disgrace myself in public, I seem to be untouched by the tragedy on Saturday. It was just too neat. Hence this train of rather non productive ratiocination. Sadly, it has no takers.

Else, I've been doing a "Rudali" over the answer scripts that my students have presented me. In response to "The lawyer was five and twenty" a student writes, "It means that he was twenty five, or it could also mean that the lawyer was five years old before he was twenty years old". Argggggggggggggggggggh......I need a mental asylum. The horror...the horror !!!

Otherwise, I am perfectly happy with my life and its hard times....

Love,

Pallavi

P.S. - Do not forget to wish me on the 13th as I turn old and grey and remain as unwise as ever. I hope my 43" Plasma T.V. is on its way.

What next?

It looks like I am caught between the devil and the deep sea. And no, I do not plan to explain. What next? Que sera sera....???

SOS

9.113.2091854.156.2965. .. 9.239198.9.235185.4514. .. !!

Onam Special

Dear Anu,

Do send me the other story as well. :)

Else, nothing much...will go to work tomorrow after a week. You celebrating Onam?

Take care...

Love,

Pallavi

* * * *

Anupama Mohan to me
show details
04:08 (6 hours ago)

i hope so! Onam is on the 27th and last time we had the most annoying (hilarious to S) experience. S and i went to 'Madras Palace' whose online menu invitingly screamed 'Onam Special'. off we went on Onam day, and after 1.5 hrs of train, bus, and biped foray, we reach the place. basically, a middle-of-nowhere oasis. first thing to notice: full-throttle south india decor and jagjit singh music playing. ok, "so India is land of contradictions, sue me." we call curly-haired muchhooless waiter. menu comes - i take one look at 'Onam special menu' leaflet in the 14 page novel that is the hotel menu and say, this one. he smiles knowingly and nods his head. left to right. i am a little anxious in case he didnt understand 'this one' said with finger pointing towards leaflet held in plain sight by other hand. confusions happen, right. he clarifies - 'sorry, maadim. no Onam special today.' i am blunderstruck - 'but today is Onam - phbttt phbttt' now it is his turn to be blunderstruck. he recovers. 'yes, maadim. we dont have Onam special. every other day we have. today No.' S is laughing bullets out of his gall bladder by now. i am still thinking he can be redeemed - the waiter that is. so i speak slowly in case he is an escapee on barbiturates. 'today - is - Onam.' the pauses in my words marked the popping of 10 children per second somewhere, probably kerala. waiter unfazed. 'oh sorry maadim, our other branch has Onam special.' i am wary but poor mallu-food-starved tummy was already beginning to get hopeful. 'where is your other branch?' beaming waiter: 'in Richmond Hill, maadim.' S had to physically restrain me from clobbering waiter into chutney powder and dosha. RichfuckingmondHill is next state away. so that was my last Onam - i was super pissed.this time though my new frd - a Mallu and a chef with a restaurant (finally i am learning the art of how to win friends and influence them to open restaurants with my kinda food) has invited us and so it just might be a culinary treat. o'wise there is always leftover stuff in the fridge and an overactive imagination!

: ) long note.

other story beneath.

tell your thoughts.

umma,

Me.

Malavun Taka Deep

Malavun Taka Deep ...this has been one of my favourite songs for multiple reasons. The music here is minimal, and it is the voice that carries the weight.

But what I find more intriguing is how the lyrics successfully combat sexual politics. The song unabashedly vocalises female physical desire. Society tends to portray women as devoid of sexuality and sexual desire. Women are pristine goddesses who are essentially sexually handicapped and paralysed. If they declare otherwise, then they are labelled prostitutes.

This song does neither, and beautifully conveys the dynamics of not singular, but mutual desire.

I have tried to translate my tongue, but I fear I have failed to capture the grandeur of the ornate language.

Of course, if one does not want to analyse the lyrics, one can always concentrate only on Lata Mangeshkar's delicate cadences.

Malavun taka deep = Diminish the light of the lamps
Chetavun aanga aanga = By the spark created by the friction of our bodies
Rajasa kiti disat = O King, it is after many days
Labhala nivaant sanga = That I have had the pleasure of your leisurely company

Tya tithe phula phulat = There amongst all the flowers
Pengete ajun raat = Night still dozes
Haya, tu karu nakos = Oh, please do not
Evadhyaat swapna bhang = So soon destroy my dreams

Chorus :Rajasa kiti disat = O King, it is after many days
Labhala nivaant sanga = That I have had the pleasure of your leisurely company
Malavun taka deep = Diminish the light of the lamps

Gaar gaar hya havet = In this cool weather
Gheuni mala kavet = Taking me into your arms
Mokale karun taak = Release
Ek vaar antarang = Once and for all, your innermost feelings and desires

Chorus : Rajasa kiti disat = O King, it is after many days
Labhala nivaant sanga = That I have had the pleasure of your leisurely company
Malavun taka deep = Diminish the light of the lamps

Door door taarkaat = Far away amongst the stars
Baisili Pahat Nhyat = Morning is bathing herself
Savakash ghe tipun = Without haste cherish
Ek ek roop ranga = Each and every aspect of my beauty

Chorus : Rajasa kiti disat = O King, it is after many days
Labhala nivaant sanga = That I have had the pleasure of your leisurely company
Malavun taka deep = Diminish the light of the lamps

He tula kase kalel = How will you ever fathom
Kon ekate jalel = Who would want to live lonely and burn with desire?
Sanga ka kadhi hare joh = Tell me, does he ever lose
Ekata jale patang = Who chooses to singe oneself and die like the candle moth?

Chorus : Rajasa kiti disat = O King, it is after many days
Labhala nivaant sanga = That I have had the pleasure of your leisurely company
Malavun taka deep = Diminish the light of the lamps

Kay ha tujhacha shwaas = What, is this your breath
Daravale ithe suvaas = That scatters its fragrance everywhere
Bola re halu, uthel = Speak softly, lest there rise
Chandanya vari tarang = ripples amongst the stars

Chorus : Rajasa kiti disat = O King, it is after many days
Labhala nivaant sanga = That I have had the pleasure of your leisurely company
Malavun taka deep = Diminish the light of the lamps

Capitulation

The capitulation is complete !! I surrender. I finally meet my Waterloo !! Tsk tsk....what a way to go....

May Musings?

What's done cannot be undone. And I'm glad. It's all for the best eventually. There is so much to look forward to. I just need to let this anger drain.

***

I want to meet Bhavya. Is there anything I can do for her? Would it serve my purpose to be a snitch?

***

I need to pen a letter soon. What shall I write? What apologies can I offer? Was I negligent? Is it too late?

***

So many reports.
So many questions

.

The Quintessence of JNS IB

Pallavi to JNS-IB-English.
show details 20:29 (0 minutes ago)

My dear students,

Exactly where is this argument going? I assume ya'll realise that I am perusing your rather entertaining exchange. And Anuj, pray why are you supposedly quoting me. Quote Shakespeare instead. He provides more colourful vocabulary.

It's been a pleasure teaching ya'll. . . though we've had our ups and downs. And I reckon I shall miss you'll (cliche?). For me, the best part of JNS = my students. Thank you for a wonderful experience.

And now let's get to business ....where are the last few CAS filesssss? ;)


Good luck for your exams.

Love,

Pallavi


- Hide quoted text -
On 13/04/07, anuj gupta wrote:
dude hridaye this aint fair man...shes making fun of u..and u aint doing shit abt it....hetali..wait let me emphazise HETALI!!!!!!! is making fun of u...i think you should do something about it..and ...kunal and hridaye...u know who the thing is..and no its not hetali...shes not THAT bad looking...i mean she is...but not that bad man hehehehe...i hope "THE THING" doesnt read this...coz she is guilty..and shell know...and yes in pallavi misses words "your so horrible"...but sorry its not affecting me in anyway..she was created by god to be made fun of..what am to do?..i am a very god fearing person..i need to obey his ways...i am sorry...u thing...you know who u are.




On 4/13/07, hetali pandya wrote:
hridayee i love uu mannnn........... u noe its all joke cause anuj nd kunal r pissin me off!!! hahahah ur my frndd due no matte wattt


Damandeip chadha < damandeip@gmail.com> wrote:
hahahahaha this is funny shit man


On 4/12/07, Hridaye Nagpal wrote:
and all this time i supported u.......fuck of now



On 4/12/07, hetali pandya wrote:
anuj u noe thts not funny at alll...................i mean don compare me 2 hridaye ....yukkkkkkkkkkk hahah


Kunal Saha wrote:
WAIT!! I got it!! i think it is..i think ...its ...HETALI!!


On 4/12/07, hetali pandya < hetali_p@yahoo.com > wrote:
haha i need help anujj...please fill in the blanksss

anuj gupta < anuj89@gmail.com> wrote:
ur a **a**i --- aka "the thing" play hangman till u get a name...(vowels are given) contact me if u need any help gaytali.


On 4/12/07, hetali pandya wrote:
aunjjj ur hridayeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.................nthn can b worst than this hahahahahhaha

anuj gupta < anuj89@gmail.com> wrote:
hetali is gayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy (no puns intended) (ull know what i mean) to make it clear for ull i mean (homoooossseeexxxxuuuaallllll) gayyyyyy



On 4/10/07, Pallavi < pallavee@gmail.com > wrote:
I will be unable to take you'll for two hours as I have other work.

Hence B div = 9 to 10 and C = 10 to 11.

Please take note of the same and inform the rest.

Regards,

Pallavi

--
I myself have never been able to find out precisely what feminism is: I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat or a prostitute

~ Rebecca West, 1913


Applesauce @ http://www.pallavees.blogspot.com/


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--
if she asks you why you can tell her that i told you that im tired of castles in the air
i have a dream i want the world to share these castle walls
leave me to dispair

sometimes the only way to make your self look good is by making others look bad and im tired of making others look good
hope to hear from you soon....
Kunal Saha


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--
I myself have never been able to find out precisely what feminism is: I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat or a prostitute

~ Rebecca West, 1913


Applesauce @ http://www.pallavees.blogspot.

An ode to the "Noble" Profession.

Teachers. A part of the noble profession? I am not so sure any more.

What am I doing? Why am I here? Is it worth it?

A snake pit !! A snake pit !!! A S s s nake pit !!!!!!!!!!!!

The students seem to be the only silver lining to this expansive black hole . . .

Waterloo?

Finally facing my Waterloo? I don't think so. . . .

Of Pachyderms..

My resolution to become a pachyderm has failed miserably. I think I shall turn into a dinosaur next. They had a thicker hide, didn't they? :)

Addicted

Either I'm dazed or I'm low. Is there no way out? Where there's a will.....hmm..hmm..hmmmm....

"Lust for Life" ? ...

...and he shoots himself eventually? I don't understand it. I prefer Monet and his parasols. So much more sheltered !!

***

Why do I use exclamations so often? That is what my students ask me. Apparently my slides are peppered with them. I apparently also use apparently very often.

That latter answers itself easily. It is so much easier to sit on the fence, to equivocate, to be ambivalent...

***

And where am I going with this? I have no idea. None at all.

Hail anarchy and confusion...I shall spend another year meandering through life !!!!!

D Day

This has been one of the lousiest days so far...I hate the 19th of December !!!!

Under the Shanghai Sun

I went to China with dual purposes. The official aim was to attend the IB Asia-Pacific Regional Workshop on CAS (Mixed Level) at the Shanghai Jincai High School in Shanghai. The unofficial one was to pick up authentic Chinese chopsticks for an ever effervescent colleague.



Every morning and afternoon from the 27th to the 29th of October was devoted to the workshop. Steven Money, the workshop leader, was efficient, and the interaction with CAS Coordinators from all over the Asia-Pacific was productive. Language proved no barrier as Angrezi, pidgin or otherwise, ruled the roost.



The Shanghai streets were not so kind, and communication proved Greek, Latin and obviously, Mandarin. Consequently, buying chopsticks was the more complex task. A comparison of Shanghai and Mumbai was inevitable thanks to Mr. Vilasrao Deshmukh's rhetoric of an impending metamorphosis.



The Chinese metropolis is divided into two parts by the Huangpu river. Acting as a timeline, the water body cuts the city into the old Puxi ( West Bank) area and the newly developed Pudong (East Bank) area. While symmetrical Pudong sent my sense of direction wandering, Puxi was more familiar with its Fort like colonial aura.



At night, Shanghai dazzles electrically (they apparently have no load shedding worries) on both sides of the Bund that separates the two banks. The Jade Buddha temple, the Yu Yuan Gardens, the French Concession and the Pearl Culture centre, amongst others, are worth a dekko. The architecture is uniformly futuristic and the landscaping meticulous. The plethora of Pizza Huts and Starbucks is proof of an economy in transition.



However, the perfect pièce de résistance loses its gilt when one comes across the impecunious begging for a few Yuan, albeit, no Dharavi is in sight. The duplicate market thrives in spite of official bans, and is reminiscent of Chor Bazaar. Disparity, though effaced, is present.



Despite the obvious cracks, Shanghai remains a city worth emulating. But is displacing and dislocating 70,000 slum dwelling families going to transform the ugly step sister into Cinderella?



We can only wait for the fairy godmother !!

Left / Right ?

Brain Lateralization Test Results

Right Brain (48%) The right hemisphere is the visual, figurative, artistic, and intuitive side of the brain. Left Brain (48%) The left hemisphere is the logical, articulate, assertive, and practical side of the brain

Are You Right or Left Brained?
personality tests by similarminds.com

Testing Times

INTJ - "Mastermind". Introverted intellectual with a preference for finding certainty. A builder of systems and the applier of theoretical models. 2.1% of total population.

Free Jung Word Test (similar to Myers-Briggs)
personality tests by similarminds.com

Sleep Deprived !!!!!

I need rest !

I need rest !!

I need rest !!!

I need rest !!!!

I need rest !!!!!

I need rest !!!!!!

I need rest !!!!!!!

And shall the rest be history?

S.O.S.

! = one day

I hate myself and want to die ...Nirvana?

Despondency

THE THOUGHTS that rain their steady glow
Like stars on life’s cold sea,
Which others know, or say they know—
They never shone for me.

Thoughts light, like gleams, my spirit’s sky,
But they will not remain.
They light me once, they hurry by,
And never come again.

~ Matthew Arnold

Diwali Resolutions...

**Kuch To Log Kahenge
Logon Ka Kaam Hai Kehna**
Chhodo Bekaar Ki Baaton Mein
Kahin Beet Na Jaaye Raina
** **

Kuch Reet Jagat Ki Aisi Hai
Har Ek Subah Ki Shaam Hui
Tu Kaun Hai Tera Naam Hai Kya
Seeta Bhi Yahan Badnaam Hui
Phir Kyon Sansaar Ki Baaton Se
Bheeg Gaye Tere Naina
** **

Humko Jo Taane Dete Hain
Hum Khoyen Hai Inn Rang Raliyon Mein
Humne Unko Bhi Chhup Chhup Ke
Aate Dekha Inn Galiyon Mein
Yeh Sach Hai Jhoothi Baat Nahin
Tum Bolon Yeh Sach Hain Na

Kuch To Log Kahenge
Logon Ka Kaam Hai Kehna


*******

Kuch To Log Kahenge is the refrain I dole out to the hoi polloi. For me, it has just been a platitude that does nothing to block the lachrymal secretions. The barbs are just as keen; and my skin as permeable as ever.

I think it's time to shed the ineffective cover, and don the garb of a pachyderm.

Hail the herds........!! :)